My brother and sister-in-law are having their first baby and I wanted to challenge myself by making the invite to their baby shower. I’ve been creating art on Rebelle for a while now and I think it came out pretty well. I used mostly watercolor and learned A LOT about drawing flowers and creating a design with multiple layers while working on this project. I think if I could do it over again, I would choose a limited color palette to work from.
They are both really into nature so we chose a ‘Baby in Bloom’ theme with lots of greenery and flowers. My brother hails from Louisiana while his wife hails from Vietnam so I incorporated flowers that were from both places. I’m particularly proud of how the roses turned out.
I love making homemade watercolor cards. These are going to family in Louisiana who I haven’t seen since February 2020 and probably won’t get to see until Spring or Summer 2021. It’s been tough, I miss them so much but I feel like these little things help us to stay connected in a small way.
Happy Anniversary card for my dad and step-mom. Watercolor and Ink.
Birthday card for my Maw-Maw. Watercolor, Ink and white Gel Pen.
So we’ve made the decision to move. Not now, but next Spring after we’ve done some home improvements and (hopefully) there is a vaccine for COVID. Unfortunately, I did a pretty ‘me’ thing to do and put all the pressure of parenting & unschooling during a pandemic, deep cleaning a house and multiple home improvements (including painting all the kitchen cabinets and all the rooms in the house) on my shoulders. Fortunately, I realized the absurdity of this a month and a half in instead of 6 months later.
I was able to talk all this over with my husband and release a lot of the self-imposed pressure but there was still some hangers-on especially when it comes to balancing my creative pursuits and my daughter’s needs. Then I came across this interview with author Austin Kleon (I’ve mentioned him before). What’s funny is that the interview was written in 2019, long before COVID hit, but I found it incredibly applicable to my current situation. For instance, this is what he would tell other parents who are juggling a career:
It’s not you. You’re probably doing the best you can. It’s just that everything is stacked against you. Everything from a lack of affordable child care, underfunded schools, crumbling infrastructure, bad health insurance, to a world that’s just really and truly insane. It’s near impossible and it’s not your fault. Just keep going. Do the best you can.
He was also very honest and wasn’t afraid to talk about the less than perfect moments of parenting such as yelling at his kids and looking forward to their bedtime. I struggle with yelling too but so often parents who share online only show the picture perfect moments or ‘tips & tricks’. It was nice to see that I am not the only parent struggling, even if his words are from a different time, in what feels like a galaxy, far, far away.
Things have been tough over here since the start of the pandemic as they have been for many, many other people across the world.
We are choosing to stay home, just the 3 of us, to celebrate Thanksgiving (minimally as it’s a crap holiday) and Christmas this year but want to still stay connected to our families. This is the first year that I will ever send a Thanksgiving card but I think it’s an important year for me to do so to remind our families how much we love them and miss them.
Watercolor and ink.
I think there is something special about sending a handmade card in the mail. It says, “I took the effort to make this for you.” Reminds me of this poster I made a while back: Ways To Show You Care. This is an updated ‘Socially Distant’ version.
Fire is an incredible thing – it is linked to our early evolution as the big-brained homo sapiens we are today. But it is also dangerous and frightening as evidenced by the wildfires in California and Australia. And yet, even wildfires have a silver lining in that they return vital nutrients to the earth.
I love a good fire for simple reasons. A fire can warm me on a winter day in a way that not even a heated blanket can manage. It provides a coziness and feeling of safety that’s almost subconscious. It reminds me of family and Christmas even though we didn’t have a fireplace when I was younger.
And all that’s just from sitting nearby – feeling the heat, smelling the burning wood and hearing the crackle of the embers. When I engage my eyes and stare into the fire, it can be an almost meditative experience. Sometimes the flames relax and mesmerize me and I achieve that elusive state where I’m thinking about nothing. Other times, I stare at the fire as my mind works over a problem.
And sometimes, we just roast marshmallows and end up with sticky fingers and happy bellies. 😉
May you be filled with warmth and feelings of coziness as we finish this winter season.
I say tantrum, but I look at it through more of an RIE parenting lense so really she had a 30 minute emotional release. And it all started because she wanted to play with the printer’s tray and I wouldn’t let her. I said, “I won’t let you play with the printer” and physically prevented her from reaching it. She pushed against my legs, crying for the next 30 minutes. And I just let her. I didn’t put her in time out; I didn’t try to bribe her or distract her with something else; I didn’t try to rationalize with her – I just quietly and calmly held the space for her to have her feelings. The most I did was prevent her from hurting me or herself and acknowledge her feelings a few times at the beginning. And I didn’t take it personally – I knew that all this crying and pushing wasn’t about me or about the printer. It was about something else entirely. Perhaps it was about all the changes that have taken place in our lives the past two months or the busy-ness of it all. Or perhaps it was something else entirely. To be honest? It doesn’t matter what it was about. What mattered was that I was able to be her safe harbor as her emotions crashed over her.
When we were about 20 minutes in, I started to wonder what the world might be like if everyone were able to have such emotional releases. If there was a judgment-free, intervention-free place where adults, teens, or children could express their anger or frustration or confusion or sadness or whatever else they might be feeling and have others quietly and courageously bear witness.
I was lucky enough to be a part of such a space for 7 years in my women’s circle and I can attest that it is truly powerful to be allowed to express one’s feelings with total acceptance. These marvelous women would bravely sit in a silent circle and bear witness to my pain. They would not offer me a tissue when my nose began to run or give me advice on how to ‘solve’ the problem. They would simply sit there, listening, watching & waiting, as I moved through my emotions. At times, the sobbing would slow down and it would seem that I was done, but these women were wise and knew to wait. A few minutes would pass and a new wave of grief or pain would wash over me and it would all begin again. They trusted that I was strong enough and capable enough to feel my feelings and to know when I was done. It was a powerful experience that I am incredibly grateful to have had and to have given to others as well, including my daughter today.
And what happened, you might ask, at the end of that thirty minutes? My sweet daughter lay on the floor, stomach down, completely spent and sniffling slightly as her breathing began to return to a normal pace. She lay there quietly breathing for about 5 minutes before she looked up at me slightly and said, “Can I watch Sarah & Duck?” And that was it. It was over and we cuddled on the couch watching our favorite duck waddle about on the TV.
It’s my first post of 2018! Woohoo! How’s your 2018 going? Mine has gotten off to a rocky start. Things always seem to fall apart for us after the holiday rush of Christmas and New Year’s is over. So I decided to revive and revamp some old reminders on my refrigerator. I had put them up sometime last year and then taken them down months later as they seemed like they were no longer needed. Ha! I was incorrect. For me, personally, these reminders are helpful with my daughter who is in the throws of the terrible (or terrific as my mother-in-law likes to say) twos. The first two are to help keep me grounded:
So often problems with my daughter arise when I haven’t been taking my time to meditate and breathe or because I’m trying to move at my adult pace. Granted, sometimes moving at an adult pace is necessary, but often times it is not and it’s important for me to remember to s l o w  d o w n. For me, I find that something magical happens when I slow down and move at my daughter’s pace. I’m able to see the world from her eyes and be fully present and connected. And really, what’s the rush?
The second two reminders are mostly in regards to my daughter but are also applicable to me:
I have a strong aversion to mess but life and toddlerhood and art and a myriad of other things can be quite messy! So this is a reminder to myself to allow messes to happen. Throw a tarp down and let the kiddo paint a cardboard box and get covered in paint from head to toe. Let her dig in the mud and pour water in her sandbox. Let her play and be messy. And also, don’t be afraid to get messy yourself – with the kiddo, in your art, in your writing, in your music, in the kitchen, anywhere!
The other reminder is a crucial one. Get outside. Last year, when I had this reminder on fridge and I was having a bad day, it helped me to remember to take the kiddo outside. To a park or just in the backyard. On days when I have very little to give her, going outside always seems to help both of us. I get to recharge (being outside does that to me) and she gets to play happily as she tends to entertain herself very easily outside.
I’m happy and grateful to have these reminders back up on my refrigerator and I can see that they are already helping. What reminders do you have (or want to have) on your fridge? Let me know in the comments. 🙂
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